Wax On Wax Off
10:50 a.m. - September 13, 2003

I cried a lot last night and saw Big's ghost standing in various places in my apartment on several occasions.

It didn't help that I was watching Entertainment Tonight and they were showing clips of Ritter and Cash which made me weepy anyway.

I wonder if Big remembered when I introduced him to Cash's version of "Personal Jesus" and how he borrowed my car one nigt to run and errand and then sat outside when he got home so he could hear the rest of the song.

Anyway.

At one point I was in the kitchen making Sponge Bob Squarepants mac and cheese and just started sobbing, laid my head down on the counter and just cried.

I couldn't sleep so I curled up on the couch and watched tv all night, taking cat naps. Aunt Flo made her triumphant return around three. I thought I would cry but didn't. I just curled back up on the couch and wondered if I should e-mail him on Monday to let him know.

Tomorrow I get the start my new birth control, the ring. I used to be excited about that but now...not so much.

I wanted to wash and wax my car today but don't think I'll have enough time before I have to go to my cousins' birthday party. I have to do the gift thing - I'm not even sure how old they are - and find something to wear. I'd like to own a pair of jeans that fit.

And I just don't feel like washing and waxing my car. I'll buy wax while I'm out and make myself do it tomorrow. I have an update on the Columbus move but I'm really fucking confused about it so I won't go into it.

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